Mood: not sure
Dreams... Some see them in color, some see them in black and white, some remember them, some forget them, some are happy, some are sad. Last night (or early this morning) This dream particularly stood out, not because it was the most wonderful dream, but because it was the first dream that I can remember that didn't end abruptly and I kind of think that may have continued after waking up to take care of something (ok, what I really meant was going to the restroom). In the past I have had dreams that I have woken up crying because of some tragedy, another one I woke up feeling content and another excited because I remember the sensation of flying.
This particular dream, didn't have anything to do with what I was watching before I went to sleep or during the course of my day. I remember that I was recruited for something and ended up confronting 2 of the people that I was sent to observe. The other amazing thing is that no one died and I ended up going home.
As the day goes on and as I write here, the clarity of the dream is slipping away from me and leaving only bits and pieces that I can remember, like at one point I was attempting to swim away from my attacker and one of them made an attempt to swim after me. However, because water is my element, I was able to fight the person off.
Anyway, after waking up, it made me think, is this a premonition of what is to become or is it symbols telling me of what is to happen?
Previously, on my website, I have written down dreams that I have had that I could remember, one of them was about a nuclear holocaust. The way I saw it in my dream and what happened in it was very similar to a movie. Which it appears that I had seen a while ago before the dream. You can read it here: My Dream
Anyway... I can, at times feel my old self coming back, the walls that I had built up when I was in high school and after, they seem to be back up. Living a solitary life, I feel a lot more secure that way and uncomfortable when i'm out in public with a lot or people. Just when I thought I had the walls down and came out of my shell, it's back again.
I've been trying to avoid my old self by going out with my friend on the weekends, but can't seem to get over it. This past Saturday, I had to go out to pick up an operating system for my computer so that I could reload it. All the time while I was out, I felt a bit agoraphobia, the fear of wide open spaces, but seem to calm down when I'm either in my vehical or back in my apartment.
Well, I guess that'll be it for this entry...
